Is Your "Woke Bae" Really Woke? 15 Signs to Look Out For

So you've finally found someone who seems like the perfect catch - they're socially conscious, politically aware, and always up for a good cause. But before you start dreaming about your future power couple status, take a step back and look for the red flags. Are they really as woke as they claim to be, or is it just a facade? Keep your eyes peeled for signs that they might not be the woke bae you thought they were. For more tips on navigating the dating scene, check out this article.

In today's society, being "woke" has become a popular term used to describe someone who is socially aware and actively seeks to challenge and dismantle systems of oppression. When it comes to dating, finding a partner who is truly woke can be a great thing. However, not everyone who claims to be "woke" actually lives up to the label. Here are 15 signs that the guy you're dating might not be as woke as he thinks he is.

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1. He Talks Over You

One of the key characteristics of being woke is actively listening and valuing the perspectives of marginalized voices. If your partner constantly talks over you or dismisses your opinions, it may be a sign that he isn't as woke as he claims to be.

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2. He Only Engages in Performative Activism

Performative activism is when someone engages in activism for the purpose of appearing woke, rather than genuinely caring about the cause. If your partner only engages in activism for the gram or to impress others, it may be a red flag.

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3. He Doesn't Acknowledge His Privilege

Being woke means acknowledging your privilege and using it to uplift marginalized voices. If your partner fails to acknowledge his privilege or becomes defensive when it's brought up, it could be a sign that he's not as woke as he claims.

4. He Makes Sexist Jokes

A truly woke partner would never make sexist jokes or belittle women in any way. If your partner's humor is rooted in misogyny, it's a clear sign that he's not as socially aware as he claims to be.

5. He's Unwilling to Learn

Being woke is an ongoing process of learning and unlearning. If your partner is unwilling to educate himself on social issues or becomes defensive when confronted with new information, it could be a sign that he's not as woke as he thinks.

6. He Fetishizes Marginalized Identities

Fetishizing someone's marginalized identity is a common problem in the dating world. Whether it's racial fetishization or fetishizing someone's sexual orientation, it's a clear sign that your partner is not as woke as he claims to be.

7. He Gaslights You

Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse where someone manipulates another person into questioning their own reality. If your partner gaslights you when you bring up important social issues, it's a clear sign that he's not as woke as he claims to be.

8. He Doesn't Respect Boundaries

Respecting boundaries is essential in any relationship, especially when it comes to discussing sensitive social issues. If your partner consistently crosses your boundaries or dismisses your need for space, it's a clear sign that he's not as socially aware as he claims to be.

9. He Doesn't Support Your Activism

A truly woke partner would support and uplift your activism, not dismiss or belittle it. If your partner fails to support your efforts in fighting for social justice, it's a clear sign that he's not as woke as he claims to be.

10. He Doesn't Challenge His Friends

Part of being woke is challenging the problematic behaviors of those around you, including friends. If your partner fails to challenge his friends when they engage in oppressive behavior, it could be a sign that he's not as socially aware as he claims to be.

11. He Isn't Intersectional

Being woke means understanding that social issues are interconnected and affect people differently based on their intersecting identities. If your partner fails to acknowledge intersectionality or only focuses on one aspect of social justice, it's a sign that he's not as woke as he claims.

12. He Doesn't Take Responsibility

A truly woke partner would take responsibility for their mistakes and actively work to do better. If your partner deflects blame or refuses to acknowledge his role in perpetuating oppression, it's a clear sign that he's not as socially aware as he claims to be.

13. He Doesn't Challenge Himself

Being woke means constantly challenging yourself to do better and be more aware. If your partner is complacent and unwilling to challenge himself, it's a clear sign that he's not as woke as he claims.

14. He Doesn't Center Marginalized Voices

A truly woke partner would actively center and uplift marginalized voices in conversations and activism. If your partner consistently talks over or dismisses marginalized voices, it's a clear sign that he's not as socially aware as he claims to be.

15. He Doesn't Do the Work

Being woke is not just about talking the talk, but also walking the walk. If your partner fails to actively engage in the work of dismantling oppression, it's a clear sign that he's not as woke as he claims to be.

In conclusion, finding a truly woke partner can be a great thing, but not everyone who claims to be woke actually lives up to the label. It's important to look out for these signs and have open and honest conversations with your partner about their level of social awareness. Remember, being woke is an ongoing process, and it's okay to hold your partner accountable and expect them to do better.